Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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