woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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