whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
