we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
