i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
