The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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