There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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