The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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