are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Randomize
