I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Randomize
