I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
