I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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