DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
