Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
