i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
