FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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