Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
