id be glad to
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
