i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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