I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
