how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
