how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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