So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
