Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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