Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
