Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
