yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
