dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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