Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
