:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
