Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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