i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
