its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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