chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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