somebody snuck up and got me drunk
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Who died my cat blue again?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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