ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Sext me about skeletons
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
