After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
