Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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