I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
