hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
