No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
