As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
