you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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