In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
