i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
