i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
