I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
