Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
