Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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