I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize