I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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